The Court Of Curiosity

It’s crazy.

It’s absolutely insane that an excuse is still an option for me.

I’ve worked hard to get to where I am today. I’ve poured hours, sweat, and hope into building a better version of myself. I’ve faced down failures and started over more times than I care to count. This isn’t my first rodeo; I know this exact feeling of being back at the starting line.

Yet, here I am. Still willing to make excuses for myself. Still negotiating with the part of my brain that would rather choose comfort over commitment. Still not doing the things I swear I’m going to do, even though I tell myself, that I want this more than anything.

It’s crazy.

The people I look up to, the ones who’ve actually built the lives I envy, all talk about one thing: fighting through your excuses. They all have the same story of choosing the hard right thing over the easy wrong thing. I’ve consumed their stories, nodded along, and thought, “Yes, that’s the way.” And then I close the book or the video and choose the excuse anyway.

The wildest part? I’m genuinely not happy with where I am. I have a crystal-clear vision of a better place, a happier me, a more fulfilled life. I know, with every logical fiber of my being, that the bridge to that place is built with the bricks of consistency. Just show up. Just do the work. It’s not a secret.

But the excuse is still there. It’s a well-worn path in my mind, a default setting I keep falling back on. It’s the option that should have been locked away, boarded up, and forgotten a long time ago. But the door is still open, and I keep walking through it.

It’s crazy that the excuse is still the option for me.

This is my reminder—to myself and to anyone else who needs to hear it- the only way to make it stop being an option is to choose differently. Right now. Not tomorrow.

The fight isn’t against some external force. It’s against the comfortable, seductive whisper of an excuse. And it’s a fight I’m tired of losing.